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For picspammy's challenge #9: Favorite Barney/Robin scenes. (Spoilers up to the most recent episode.)




1.08 The Duel

Ted: I should really make this call.
Robin: Ooh, can I do it?
Barney: Hello?
Robin: Hi there, sexy.
Barney: Hello, Aunt Kathy, what's up?
Robin: Oh, nothing. Just sitting here, thinking about you, hot stuff.
Barney: An accident? Well, is Uncle Rudy gonna be ok?
Robin: Aunt Kathy's got an itch only you can scratch, big boy.
Barney: Oh god! Why did he think he could build his own helicopter?
Robin: Come on, daddy, break me off a piece of that white chocolate.
Barney: Well, if he needs a transplant, he can have mine. I'll be right there.

1.14 Zip, Zip, Zip

Robin: Ok, you and me, that's insane. If you even thought about it for one second-
Barney: Well, I have thought about it, for three seconds, and it makes a lot of sense. We both think the marriage commitment thing's a drag, we both want something casual and fun, and we clearly get along really well.
Robin: Wow, that actually did make a lot of sense.

Barney: You like Ted. Wow. This is huge.
Robin: Barney, I don't like Ted. He's moved on, and I'm really happy for-
Barney: Yeah, yeah. Look, are we going to play battleship or what?
Robin: You're not gonna tell him, are you?
Barney: No.

Ok, I had an incredibly difficult time choosing between all the Barney/Robin scenes in this episode. This eventually won out, though, solely for Barney's "No." That was the moment I fully fell in love with Barney and this ship and really the show as a whole. But, I mean, this whole episode just serves to prove why these two are made for each other. Barney's little speech about all the reasons they are perfect for each other is so true. And they're bros! They play laser tag and battleship and drink scotch and smoke cigars and make fun of Ted!

2.11 How Lily Stole Christmas

Barney: This is a low moment for the Barnacle. I should be off playing laser-tag right now but instead ... don't look at me, I'm hideous.
Robin: You just look like a regular guy.
Barney: Exactly, I'm a Ted! I'm wearing elastic waste fleece pants
Robin: And isn't it more comfy?
Barney: [ashamed] ...Yes.
Robin: Come on, you need to eat something.
Robin: Fine, I'll feed you.
Barney: Ouchy in my mouth! ... I don't want it. I want ice cream.
Robin: No, you're not having ice cream for dinner just because you're sick.
Barney: But my throat hurts.
Robin: No...
Barney: I HATE YOU!
Robin: Oh. [stands up to leave]
Barney: Don't leave me.

3.02 We're Not From Here

Barney: Welcome home, Scherbatsky.
Robin: Ah, good to be back.

I debated between this one and the earlier one in the episode where Barney's like "You haven't changed," but I love that it's just the two of them in this scene, and that they clink their glasses together. And I love how he's right in the end because he understands her.

3.14 The Bracket

Barney: Hey there, how are you doing?
Robin: Fine, Barney, I mean, fine, stranger.
Barney: Wow, you really are awful at this, aren't you.
Robin: Get your hand off my thigh, Barney.
Barney: It's supposed to look like we're about to hook up, Robin.
Robin: You know, I'm curious: What do you say to these girls to get them to come home with you?
Barney: Usually I just lean in and whisper this one thing in their ear. [whispers it] You're a little turned on right now, aren't you?
Robin: ...No. [giggles]

3.16 Sandcastles in the Sand

Barney: All right, I can't find your video. I wasted three days tr-... What's the matter?
Robin: Simon dumped me in his van after the show.
Barney: Yeah, Robin, that was like, ten years ago.
Robin: No, tonight.
Barney: Oh, really? Oh, come here. Come here.
Robin: It's just... when I was young, I was so vulnerable and open to things, you know? I guess I just... I wanted to feel like that again. I wanted to be sixteen again.
Barney: Robin, that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard come out of your mouth. You want to be sixteen again? I have watched your first Robin Sparkles video a thousand times, and it's not because I'm proud of you as a friend. It's because you were totally, totally lame back then. But now, come on. Pakow! You're the most awesome person I have ever known. Well, second most awesome.
Robin: Right. Of course. The first being you.
Barney: No. No, the first is this guy who lives in a place called the mirror. Whatup? I'm saying that you are way more awesome than Simon will ever be.

I'm cheating by including both scenes because I wanted to only choose one scene an episode or else this would become more of a Barney/Robin episodes than scenes picspam, but how could I choose between these two? I'm including them both because I've decided they're more of a sequence than a scene. (Even if that's not actually true.)

4.01 Do I Know You?

Robin: Hey, um, so I went to the chiropractor yesterday. That guy bent me over the table and pounded me for a good hour.
Barney: Is insurance going to cover that? Sometimes they don't.
Robin: That's it? Ok, well, um, today I was at the dentist. That guy drilled me all day long. He drilled me hard. He filled all of my cavities. Come on, man!
Barney: Well, your teeth look fantastic.
Robin: Who are you? Nothing? Not even a glance? I mean, even I was thinking about rocking a motorboat on those bad boys. What the hell is wrong with you, Barney?
Barney: I don't always want to be that guy. Sometimes I want to be someone you can have an actual conversation with. Now, tell me something about you that I don't know yet. Seriously.
Robin: Ok. There's a job opening at a new cable network that would be perfect for me - completely legit world news, interviews with people who matter - but I decided I'm not going to apply.
Barney: Why not?
Robin: Because I'm a joke. I'm just the scary news lady from some stupid local news channel.
Barney: Hey. We both know you're more than that. Promise me you'll apply.
Robin: Barney, it's not as easy-
Barney: Promise me you'll apply.
Robin: Ok, I promise.

4.10 The Fight

Robin: Wow, look at your eye. You look like a badass. I'm surprised to see you had it in me. You. Had it in you.
Barney: Do you... want to touch it?
Robin: Oh my god, it's warm.

4.14 The Possimpible

Barney: What happened?
Ted: Robin has to move back to Canada.
Barney: Oh my god, how awful. I mean, for one thing, it's going to be a really long commute.
Robin: What do you mean?
Barney: I finished your video resume on my own. Messengered it to every station in the city. A guy from Channel 8 called. He loved you. He wanted you to come in and audition.
Robin: Oh my god!
Barney: I told him no. Robin Scherbatsky doesn't audition. He gives you the job or nothing.
Robin: So I got the job?
Barney: No. He cursed me out and hung up. But then Channel 12 called. They also loved you. They offered you a job hosting their new morning talk show.
Robin: Barney, that's amazing!
Barney: I told them to shove it.
Robin: Dude!
Barney: Which only made them want you more. So they jacked up their offer by ten percent. Congratulations, Miss Scherbatsky. It looks like you're gonna have to stay.
Robin: How did you pull this off?
Barney: I am the master of the possimpible.
Robin: You really are. Thank you.

4.19 Murtaugh

Barney: Hi, this is Barney--
Robin: --and Robin.
Barney: We can't answer the phone right now because--
Robin: --he's watching sports, and I'm--
Barney: --probably out shopping. [both laugh] Leave a message and we'll call you back just as soon--
Robin: --as--
Barney: --we--
Both: --can!